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it’s never good enough for the emcee

06/01/2009

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emcee: How’s everybody doing tonight?

my brain: who’s this guy?

emcee: I said “how’s everybody doing tonight?”

my brain: Oh, he’s for real asking.

me: doing fine!

emcee: I know you can do better than that. I said “HOW’S EVERYBODY DOING TONIGHT?”

my brain: Oh it’s one of these guys.  I refuse to chime in again.

emcee: One more time.  “HOW’S EVERYBODY DOING TONIGHT?”

my brain: So, if I don’t yell right now, he won’t stop? I feel so manipulated.

me: WOOHOO! DOING GREAT! HOW ARE YOU?

emcee: So who’s excited to see the show tonight?

my brain: the show as in not you?

emcee: I said, “WHO’S EXCITED TO SEE THE SHOW TONIGHT”

me: GET OFF THE @#$%* STAGE!  (we all said it, but to him it’s just crowd noise)

As an event emcee, I understand the temptation to use this technique.  Those first few moments in front of a crowd are quite paralyzing, and we’ll use whatever desperate gag we have to get a them on our side.  But let’s be honest, you can’t force a relationship.  Just ask my barber or the waitress that always kneels and sometimes tries to sit in the booth with me.

And if you’re like me in a crowd, you only participate because your trying to speed up the act. ME = emcee chaired.  (yes, I just made that up)

There needs to be a better option for emcee’s when they first walk out, and I’m asking you to help me think of one.  I need a new technique.   Besides, this one could be offensive at hearing aid conventions or shows funerals.

Ideas?

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  • http://www.nuvement.com Jarrett Stevens

    MC Tripp,
    This is how I like to get things started when I Emcee.

  • Me

    I’m just glad that you call the dude who cuts your hair you barber and not your stylist.

  • http://www.lifecenterworship.net Nathan Lewellyn

    I’ve done a little MC action in my day, and I normally just start fighting. Throw some bows and show who’s dominant!! Then they will respect…

  • http://cjsmiller.blogspot.com Chris Miller

    I prefer to wad up 20′s into plastic eggs and fire them at the crowd from a cannon. At first everyone is screaming because they think I’m trying to kill them. Then they realize I’m giving out cash, and they scream: “We want more!” That’s when I know I have them.

  • AM

    http://stufffchristianslike.blogspot.com/2008/05/257-eagles.html

    Eagle screeches aren’t just for getting your church excited, they will work in any venue

  • http://patrickpizzaparty.blogspot.com Patrick

    Make the crowd wait a good 2 minutes and then jog back and forth across the stage and unenthusiastically say “St. Louis, St. Louis,” or whatever other city you may be Emceeing in. Proceed to enthusiastically list and thank tons of corporate sponsors for the event. Then drop an eff bomb towards those who have their cellphones still on. Demand that clips of you will be on youtube. And most importantly, constantly remind the audience that you are gold.

  • http://www.bradruggles.com Brad Ruggles

    Totally with you bro. HATE, HATE, HATE when emcee’s and especially pastors use cheap tricks like this to “fire up” the crowd.

    Oh, and that “ME = emcee chaired”…absolutely golden.

  • http://volcrazy.livejournal.com brad

    if you just want a cheap laugh and sympathy…walk on stage. let awkwardness of silence build. have a little kid run on stage and punch (or kick) you in the nads.

    crowd laughs…sorta cute…when you get your breath back, they are eating out of your hands.

  • http://twitter.com/gabriellaheidi gabriellaheidi

    I don't really have advice for what you could say instead but it made me think of this post: http://www.jonacuff.com/stuffchristianslike/2008/…

    (and even better… the illustration in the book.) :)